Welcome to the Zit List, where we tell you exactly what to think about the week that was.

Link: Tiger Trauma
Things probably can’t get much worse for Tigs – one of his mistresses released the text messages he sent her. Yeah, yeah, the affair stuff is disturbing, but far MORE disturbing is the fact that the text messages suggest that Tiger thought he was a CIA agent in the process.
Rating: 3 zits

Link: The Day the Music Died
Influential musician Alex Chilton passed away this week due to a heart attack after a long career in the industry. He helmed the Box Tops at age 16 and Big Star during the 1970s; in the ensuing decades, legions of indie and pop artists alike were influenced by his sound.
Rating: 5 zits

Link: Don’t Stop the Madness
March Madness is upon us, and many brackets have already been thrown askew by upsets of top-seeded teams. 1 zit in deference to those teams’ dashed dreams, but underdogs are always more exciting. Put your seatbelts on!
Rating: 1 zit

Sam's pedi-slippers... tell-tale relaxation!

Despite the constant media frenzy over the scandal, the failed apology and Tiger’s worsening public approval; the family seems to be working out their issues. Elin recently moved back into the mansion and neighbors spotted the troubled couple kissing. Woods has undergone treatment at a Mississippi sex rehab clinic. Adding salt to the wound and against the family’s pleas for privacy, radio shock jock, Howard Stern recently held a “Tiger Woods Mistress Beauty Contest.” Mistress #toomanytocount, Jamie Jungers took home $75,000 and the crown.

With all of this mayhem going on there’s no doubt Elin and Sam needed a day to unwind, and what better way than with a few spa treatments. The Woods’ girls escaped Tuesday afternoon to Magic Nails in Windermere, FL where they had some good bonding over mommy-daughter mani-pedis.

Granted you (hopefully) haven’t been through what the Woods ladies have endured… but have you ever used bonding time at the spa as a form of stressful reality escape?

Image Courtesty of People

Welcome to the Zit List, where we tell you exactly what to think about events, people, and things that happened this week.

Tiger Woods: Golfer? I Hardly Know ‘Er!
After last week’s bizarre one-man accident, new information leaking out all but confirms Woods and his wife were arguing about his infidelity the night he took his ride for a little commune with a nearby tree. And his dogging around doesn’t look like it was limited to just one or two affairs. Tsk, tsk, Tiger. Wasn’t making millions by swinging a stick enough for you?
Rating: 4 zits

Marilyn Monroe, pothead?
A newly released silent film shows the bombshell smoking marijuana in the late 1950s. By all accounts, she looks relaxed and happy and, given the tumult of so many other times in her life, it’s hard to begrudge her chasing a little happiness, all lawbreaking aside.
Rating: 1 zit

Monkeying Around
Yale undergrads, who apparently haven’t seen the fine Dustin Hoffman vehicle Outbreak, were fooled by an e-mail alleging monkeys diseased with a rare (and fake!) hemorrhagic fever had broken loose from a research lab and were running around campus. As pranks go, this is a fine one!
Rating: 0 zits, well played

For the Person Who Has Everything
It’s the holidays, so I suppose it’s only natural that something like this would emerge…but this week we were graced with a doozy of a gift. If you don’t have a fireplace, and you want a fireplace, and you have a TV, but you never want to watch the TV while the fireplace is going or have the fireplace going while you watch TV…uh, here you go. It’s a DVD of a fireplace. To make your TV a fireplace.  Be sure to get up very close to it to catch the wisps of warmth emanating from the cathode ray tubes. Just like the real thing!
Rating: 3 zits