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Just like any fair-skinned teenage girl from New Jersey should, I used to be wildly obsessed with my tan. “A day is never wasted if you go to sleep tanner than when you woke up” or something like that was my lame excuse for a personal motto—no gymming or laundry necessary; was I less dynamic than The Situation?
Well, times have changed and wrinkles and sun spots are no longer just fables to keep me from my motionless mission in the gorgeous yellow gleam from 10 am till sunset. Tanning beds are absolutely out of the question; oh how disappointed I am in my younger foolish self! However, I still do love a glowing tan, I just now adapted a few sneaky ways to make it happen while keeping safe from the sun’s unfortunate side effects. I call it: The 7-Step Smoke & Mirrors Tan Plan.
STEP ONE: Sunscreen
To begin the real part of your tan (because this really works better when you’re not channeling Casper) promise me you will always apply sunscreen with at least SPF 30. I love Pevonia Botanica Hydrating Sunscreen – it’s one of the top spa-recommended sunscreens, and it’s what I used on my recent trip to Cali. It’s chock full of vitamins and completely oil-free, so it can work as a moisturizer as well, even if it’s not a pool day. $40 on Pevonia.com. Also, check out these 3 eco-friendly sun shields under $10.
STEP TWO: Maui Babe
You may or may not be familiar with my obsession with Maui Babe, a vestige of my tanorexic years that I just cannot seem to kick. Nor do I want to. As long as it’s used over SPF you’re safe, and it is still hands down the best tanning formula on the planet. And when I say tanning I mean browning. I’ve still yet to burn with the Babe. Starting at $13.99 on mauibabe.com.
STEP THREE: A Misting Sunless Self-Tanner
Since you should never be sitting in the sun all day (and who has the time, really?), this is where you mix your real bronze with your fake one. At-home tanning formulas allow you to build gradually, as needed. Applying every other day is a good pace when you want to be building your tan without looking orange. This one from Mystic Tan gives an incredibly rich and even tone. After drying off from your shower, hold about 8 inches from your skin, spray all over, stand still for a few minutes to dry, and in a few hours you’ll be “back from vacation”. $38 on amazon.com.
STEP FOUR: Liquid Bronzer
The funny thing about beauty products is that sometimes they don’t do what they promise, and sometimes they do even better things they didn’t promise. This MAC Skinsheen Leg Spray doesn’t actually do much for your legs, so I’ve found, but it works wonders on your face! It has never caused me to break out, but if you have sensitive skin, I’d try it in the store first. Put a spritz on your fingers, then apply evenly to your face and neck for an added out-the-door glow. $26.50 at MAC.
STEP FIVE: Powder Bronzer
I’ve used a lot of great bronzers – NARS Bronzing Powder, Lola Sand & Sun, HOOLA by Benefit… but none so readily available and affordable as Physicians Formula Powder Palette. Don’t use the baby brush it comes with unless it’s an emergency though – it’s too small to apply it well. Someone should really tell them this. $11.99 on drugstore.com
STEP SIX: Canon Powershot Digital Elph
I’m always shocked when more people don’t know about this! It’s my favorite little smoke and mirrors tanning secret, and I’m spilling it now. Canon PowerShot cameras have a tan setting – it’s the D for Darker Skin Tone under My Colors, and it will make your Facebook friends think you spend every weekend in Miami. I own this one in orange; if you’re on the market for a new digi, this one is positively perfect and will almost match your new tan. $199.99 at Bestbuy.com.
Exhibit 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6 on me, and 2, 4, and 6 my gay hubby Michael last week. Which brings me to STEP SEVEN of the Smoke & Mirrors Tan Plan… wear white!
As all good Twihards know, the sun makes vampires sparkle. There’s just one problem.
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